AI Is Going to Do the Dating for You
Making dating "easier" with AI might actually end up making it a lot harder.Whitney Wolfe Herd, the founder of Bumble, one of the world’s most popular dating apps, said recently that it would soon be possible for human beings to be even further removed from the inconvenience of interacting with actual people. How? AI algorithms could easily take up the slack, creating even more perfect matches than the users could themselves. She called the AI your personal “dating concierge” and noted that it could be employed to find other “concierges” out there in the app as well.
“There is a world where your dating concierge could go date for you with other dating concierge, and then you don’t have to talk to 600 people,” she said.
The AI could hypothetically take your data and then scan the nearby region to figure out which people you should meet up with. Dating apps already employ matching algorithms, but the concierge would take it a step further and take away any need for human engagement at all. Here’s a clip of Herd making her remarks.
She also talked about using AI to teach users how to interact with people, to “show up in a better way,” etc. AI will not only do the matchmaking but it will perform the role once reserved for parents, mentors, and basic practice. In short, Herd wants AI to take all the messy hard work involved in actually getting to know someone, face to face. Rob Henderson thoughtfully puts it this way:
The Bumble founder is selling the fantasy that you can enjoy the company of others without effort. Yes, dating can be tedious. Sometimes you have to crush a lot of rocks to find a gem. But outsourcing real-world interaction to AI will diminish you. You will learn less about yourself, your likes and dislikes. It will make you a less interesting person, and, ultimately, a less desirable partner.
Can A Machine Flirt For You? | The Free Press (thefp.com)
Well said. Sooner or later, to date someone means sitting across the table from them and having a conversation. Could AI explicate aspects of my personality, package it, and sell it to the other representative bots in the dating pool? Sure, but where is the humanity in that? Where, most importantly, is the “love” in that?